Aunt Flow, Cheetos & Box Wine

Hey Y'all! 

I have so missed this link-up...about as much as I miss fatty foods while dieting! And just so were clear that's ALOT! I always know I can get a damn good laugh on Wednesdays with all you funny ladies!

I confess...that I opened a bottle of wine at 3:00 on Monday and it was gone by 5:30 when Michael was just getting home from work. And I don't regret it one damn bit...

I confess...I’ve contemplated becoming an full-time alcoholic to lose weight. My Aunts live on box wine and never gain a pound but if I eat celery I gain 3. 

I confess...that I could eat Flamin' Cheetos every. damn. day. They are like a spicy drug for me. 

I confess...that since Aunt Flow is here for the week....I have been a RAGING BITCH! My whole body hurts, I'm hot, and I need these ninjas removed from my ovaries.  

I confess...with Michael and I trying to eat healthier I told him he better not lose more weight than me, but if he were to ever tell me I better not get too fat, I would throat punch him in his fucking sleep! 

With my 1 year blog anniversary coming up next week, I hope all y'all join my $25 Visa gift card giveaway that went live TODAY! :) 

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I Ain't No Cinderella.

Hey Lovelies!

I hope y'all are enjoying your weather, wherever y'all may be! I am for sure enjoying the weather so far this summer here in our part of Texas...because typically this time of year it's 102 with 100% humidity and last week it was 85 degrees! I mean really?! Does it get any better than that?! We were outside as much as we could be last week because it felt great for my ass not to be sweating. But with being outside I feel like I have to be listening to music...which then usually goes with an adult beverage in my hand. They just all go together, you know!? 

But, back to listening to music...I have came to discover that I am in a more willing/pleasant mood if I listen to music while cleaning...working out, working on my tan or just about anything! There's something about turning the music up super loud while scrubbing the bathtub that makes me feel less like Cinderella's bitch and more like the badass wife/mom I am! :) So I want to share some of the songs on my playlist with y'all....because I effin expect all y'all to feel like badasses! 

Ed Sheeran-Sing

Josh Abbott Band-Evil Woman

Charli XCX-Boom Clap

Run DMC-It's Tricky

Florida Georgia Line-I'm in a Hurry

Paramore-Ain't It Fun 

Iggy Azalea & T.I- Change Your Life

Randy Rogers Band-Let It Go

Ryan Bingham-Country Roads

Don't forget to check back for my blog anniversary giveaway next week! :) 

It's July 21st Already?!?

Good Morning Y'all! I promise I haven't left my blog behind...it's just been a super busy month so far though, like I told y'all a couple weeks ago Lane is here for the month of July. :) We started off the month by celebrating 4th of July with a lot of Michael's family at Richland Chambers Lake for the weekend. I'm not a huge fan of fireworks for several reasons so I did my best to enjoy the firework show with included....a beer in my hand. Our 19 year old niece came and stayed the long weekend with us so she got to experience the great time I get to have with my in-laws. I mean my sister-in-law is my total bestie...it's so bad that Michael jokes that she would pick me over him if we were to ever go through the "D" word! 

Lane has also got to spend a few days in Fort Worth with my mom visiting majority of my family. My mom and I have had some issues recently but I am truly grateful that no matter what happens between us she is and always has been awesome to Lane and I can't ask for anything else. :) Anyways...Currently we are gearing up for our family of 3 Galveston Beach trip at the end of the week to go deep sea fishing...for sharks! I am so damn excited, maybe even more than the boys! Lane has been telling everybody that he just knows that I will be the one to catch a shark...just because I'm so effin afraid of them! I'll be posting everything on Instagram, wish me luck!

This month has already flown by...Its hard to believe we're already over half way through the month. But we enjoyed every minute of playing outside with the dogs, swimming with cousins, Lane getting a mohawk, playing on the trampoline with a sprinkler underneath, all of the fishing, shopping for Lane's first pair of football cleats, watching movies together as a family, going to town for the best snow cones on the planet, and cooking on the grill! 

 

P.S. Next week is my 1 year BLOG ANNIVERSARY! I can't even believe it's been a year! But I have truly enjoyed it so much! Be sure and check back for an awesome giveaway to celebrate me and my blog! :)

Weekend Recap

Happy day beauties! Hope y'all are having a fantastic week!

I am a little late on the recap of my weekend, which was full of baseball...shocker, I know! We lost our game before the championship and headed home early, but Lane made some awesome plays this weekend, so I'm extra proud. But...guess what?! It was our last tournament for a couple months! We don't usually play in July or August because it's just so damn hot. So I am really looking forward to our break and to spend some time with my boys. :)  

Especially since I just picked Lane up yesterday for him to stay the month with us! Yayyy! Michael and I love this time more than we can ever explain because for this period of time we get to really feel like a full time family. I know that might sound strange but when he's only here for a couple days at a time, it makes the July extended stay even more precious to us. 

We will be heading to Galveston to end our month of fun to go deep sea fishing! My boys are beyond excited, so if they are happy...I am happy. :) I have so much planned and can't wait to share with y'all!

Stay Tuned! 

P.S...My 1 year anniversary to my blog is coming up at the end of this month so be sure and look for an awesome giveaway! :)

Who's Your Padre!?

Well we made it out alive...barely. I finally got home from my girls only beach trip to South Padre Island and I am wore slap out. I would have wrote this post earlier but instead I have been racking my brain on how 1 man can dirty an entire house in a week! So you guys can blame Michael for my extended absence. But I am happy to be home even though I had a fabulous time with some awesome ladies that I adore! This year there were 10 of us so we decided to rent out the penthouse in our condo...which resulted in me singing "I'm So Fancy" all week. Apologizes to all. 

The beach at South Padre is by far the prettiest of all Texas beaches.

There were a few downfalls...like when I was so hungover that I nearly tossed my cookies in a toddler's sand bucket on the beach. I really don't understand why I do that to myself!! I know I'm gonna feel like shit the next day but I still think I am a badass and can handle it. Once again I failed. :) Or there was the group of speedo wearing old men who planted their asses in the sand beside us. Who gave me the urge to toss my cookies again...this time without the help of alcohol!

By the end of the week I was so bloated from the fabulous food and all the alcohol consumed that I had to get right back to eating like a rabbit as soon as I got home. But I really think I could live on fish tacos for the rest of my life, then these had grilled zucchini and squash with them. Yummy!

Result of all the alcohol comsumed by my drunk ass...ducklips. 

Rolling Rock in a frosty glass..thank you beer gods!!

This should explain a lot...

All and all it was a great vacation filled with fabulous food, tons of alcohol and sun kissed tans! 

Be sure and stop by the Blog Baton Instagram tomorrow, yours truly will be taking it over for the day! 

Humpday Confessions

It's Humpday! Yay! That means that when I have the time I am linking up with fellow badass Kathy @ Vodka and Soda for her weekly Humpday Confessions linkup party. Since it's been awhile since I have told y'all about my dirty and weird confessions andddd I am on this new journey to drop some pounds from my ass. I decided I would share my health and fitness confessions with you guys this week. :) 

I confess...that when I eat clean, I poop a lot. It's like my body hates me for all the junk food and alcohol I have ever put in my body.

I confess...that if I see you at the gym with a full face of makeup, a coke in your hand, hair curled and your walking at a pace of 1.1 on the treadmill...I am most certainly giving you the side-eye and judging you at the same time! 

I confess...that I have had dreams of face planting on the treadmill, with a giant treadmill facial burn included. 

I confess...that I think I am burning more calories in some bizarre way when I eat spicy foods. 

I confess...that I get on the scale after I poop to see how much weight I have lost. 

I confess...that I will not run in public because my boobies are to big and I am not trying to give myself a black eye with small children around. 

What are some of y'all's fitness or health confessions??

Don't forget to go visit Kathy and the rest of the cool kids on the link-up! 

Ryan really wants to see you! 

Sriracha Broccoli

Happy Tuesday friends! 
Since sriracha is one of my favorite things on earth and broccoli is my favorite veggie, I just had to try this recipe that combines the two.

It's been said that I am a horrible cook but this recipe was even easy for me...and that's saying a lot! I made it a few weeks ago, and if you follow my Instagram you saw that I paired this side dish with a salmon fillet covered in roasted salsa. It was just Michael and I for dinner so I added a little more sriracha than what the recipe actually calls for since we like things hot and spicy....you know kinda like us! :)) 

Ingredients:

3 Heads of Broccoli

2 Tbs Soy Sauce

2 Tsp Sesame Seed Oil

3 Tbs Sriracha (your choice on how spicy you want it. Use 1 1/2 tbs for less spicy

1 Garic Clove

Handful of Crushed Peanuts (15 peanuts or so)

Black Pepper, to taste

1. Preheat the oven to 400°.

2. Cut the broccoli from the stalk into small florets and wash & dry well.

3. In a large bowl, mix all the seasonings and diced garlic together.

4. Coat the broccoli evenly.

5. Put the seasoned broccoli onto a baking pan.

6. Bake for 15 minutes, but remember to toss it half way through.

7. Serve with extra crushed peanuts on top!

***No reason to worry if broccoli is brown, cooked soy sauce turns it brown.